Uninteresting...

I tried to sit here and think of something interesting and cool to say, but that is not happening.  Being with 9 year olds all day, I think I lost the ability to verbalize anything. So here goes my random thoughts for the day...

I read an article in the Orlando Sentinal yesterday about the increase in Homeschooling  in the state of Florida. I've often thought that I would never consider homeschooling my kids as an option. The more I thought about it the more appealing it became. I always have this guilty feeling for leaving my kids and going to work. I know I am lucky in the fact that my mom watches Nathan and only family watched Madi too. It's just not the same as being with them myself. I feel I most likely missed some of their "firsts"  and that is devastating to me. So if hubby's salary and mine happen to switch places I will seriously consider homeschooling.

Are you captured by fear of failure? I am!  We seriously have no idea what we are going to do about a house in July. No idea if we are going to buy and no idea  where. That is the biggest problem. In this economy, we are so afraid to give up our jobs. We are both in very secure positions right now.  I have enough years in that I am up there on the seniority ladder and we have really good health insurance. So do I stay here because I have a secure, good paying job or do we say f*** it and try to be more happy. It is such a battle.

Do you ever feel like you are on the outside of your life looking in? It is such an insane  feeling.  I don't know how to get past this. You know, I think I am really just tired cause I am tearing up for American Idol contestants. Maybe when I get good sleep again...